Crown Aficionados Pillows

'You peasants should be ashamed and embarrassed to have your king appear in this tinny crown and shabby robe!'

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

'The Burrito King.'

Birds of the Pacific Northwest: Belted Kingfisher

King on the toilet whilst jester laughs because the toilet paper is out of reach.

'I'd think you'd be used to having a moat by now.'

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

"A Bill of Rights? - Don't you TRUST me?"

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

Trading half a kingdom for a lesser steed!

'Of all the technological advances from the last 60 years, this is one's favourite.'

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

"Grant them amnesty and then hang them."

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

'This year, Sire, I've created a socko narrative of scatological raillery and rollicking nihilism which ends with a sexy justification for third quarter losses.'

"And His Majesty sends you a great big kiss, too."

'Could you scoot your chair over this way a little dear?'

"I welcome the discussion."

Disraeli becomes Earl of Beaconsfield

'I'd like three dozen friendship cards -- this war has gone on long enough.'

"If we went to war, wouldn't God be on the spot?"

Cat with Crown.

'My son made it for me in shop class.'

The Queen

"'Happily ever after' you want? Then you keep the house kosher!"

I told you the King wasn't ready for irony!

"He mistook jesting for heckling."

Mouse King

Lost and found - 'Can you desribe it?' (Queen being asked having lost her crown).

Possible Titles For My Upcoming Autobiography

Queen Anne

'When I first met the queen she was a hat check girl and I had to marry her to get my crown back.'

The Loneliness of Power