Critter_keeper Gifts

'Maybe I shouldn't have brought the termites,'

'Oh, really?... I'm actually more of a dog person.'

Billy would watch his ant farm for hours on end.

He acts all cool and feral until the can of food comes out. Jingle jingle jingle.

'Rabbits make great pets, but it's best to have them one at a time.'

"It's a new year, and I have a brand new attitude. Which way is it to San Diego Sea World?"

"Has anyone turned in a chicken?"

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"I did what you asked and got rid of my white mice."

Cat plays a golf shot from a litter box.

'What a lot of fuss, fancy being afraid of an 'itsy-bitsy' little mouse like this!'

My Bowl Is Empty.

'Alex we talked about this, you can't bring live things home from the lake. . . no buts, they don't want to leave the lake. Let your little friends go.'

"Don't be such a baby. You're officially an endangered species, so I'm going to have to earmark you."

Woman welcomes back her cat but not its new kittens.

"He says he can quit anytime, but I'm starting to worry."

EARTH DAY. Whatever.

'Please bow your head and cough. I need to check your hairballs.'

"Relax - it's just for a few days until they find a place of their own."

Vodka

Humane Mouse Trap "It doesn't kill them,. It just makes them feel really guilty about inconveniencing you."

'Well, you have people pox.'

Before you feed him/After you feed him.

Zen Kitten

Worm Appreciation Society!

'Tootsie-pie is going to be spaded, just like Mother.'

She envied her sometimes - all footloose and feline-free.

"Eggs, eggs, eggs...that Delia Smith's ruining my life."

'There's a bee here from the Food and Drug Administration who wants to inspect the hive.'

'You're right, I am not a native: My ancestors came to this country with the Conquistadors...'

Never wanting to harm any creature, the Buchanans outfitted their car with the hydraulic Critter Clearance System.

'I think it's time we told kitty she was adopted.'

Cat coming out of a maternity ward.

I tried thinking outside the box once. That was a big mistake!

'Come on children, last one out's a rotten egg.'