Crime Busters Pillows

'Never mind the root causes!'

Parole officer: Hanging in and hanging out.

Department of Criminology

hard-boiled egg...

'You know too much,'

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"The numbers don't lie . . . but we do."

The new Physics

"I worked hard, I played hard and I embezzled hard."

Lawyer's secretary has in boxes labeled: Before the Fact and After the Fact.

'All right pal, just hand over the nose and nobody gets hurt.'

'I have a bad feeling about this place, Watson... and I smell a rat!'

Mystery Writing 101 - Mailbox: The butler did it, the gardener, the chauffeur.

Dog detectives

"My client was across town at the time of the murder, as a quick sniff of Exhibit A will demonstrate."

"He did it!"

"If a tree falls in the forest and hits a certain individual, would he still be able to testify?"

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

"We understand you wish to report a crime Madam? I'm Inspector La Garde and this is my able assistant Defective Constable Wallis."

'Apparently my DNA had guilt written all over it.'

'By the looks of these skid marks, Humpty didn't fall- he was pushed!'

Phone Hacking Explained - 50 p.

'Ragrding our cash-flow problewm, it's agreed then...Sims enters the bank at 10am, Riggs will follow, and Yates drives the getaway car...'

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

STRIP Hambone: Computer an accessory to computer fraud

"I told you we should have had separate trials."

"Fifth robbery this week. That's not a security camera ??" a local TV news station installed it to save time."

'We've got a new DNA database...'

Locking Up Crime

'Vice squad - you're busted.'

'Your father installed a security system.'

'This is a simple case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.'

"Well well, Mr. Chamberlain. It seems you've discovered my secret."

"Yours is the worst case of identity theft I've investigated."

Sistine murder