Crime Buster Pillows

'Waaiiiit a minute here... how do I know you're the real fraud department and not just posing as one?'

Whistle blower...

'Actually, the guy I was chasing got away. But thanks for pulling over - you're better than nothing.'

'A Policeman hey? My dad is a crime-fighter too: He's a Forensic Accountant...'

'I am arresting you for phone hacking.'

'The prisons are full, so I'm releasing you back into the wild.'

"Fifth robbery this week. That's not a security camera ??" a local TV news station installed it to save time."

Using Bees for Crime Prevention

"Dang, he flushed the evidence. Take him downtown. I'll catch up with you later. Right now I could use a drink."

Auditing

'Ring the Sarge, Mary, and tell him that we've booked the counterfeiting gang and I'm just taking a few notes!'

'Hey, rookie! Go chase that guy!'

'Have you a jemmy handy, sarge? I was only trying to protect his head while putting him into the car!'

Policeman: 'Holy Smokes!'

'Apparently Bill has had his identity stolen.'

'Your partner made it easy for us, Rock! Maybe he should have canceled his Website, www.ourhideout.com.'

'Police are looking for a man with one eye called Johnson.'

'May I pay you with a sleazy investment scam?'

Bureau of Missing Persons

'Your father installed a security system.'

'So your Lordship, this burglar you caught - where is he now?'

"I knew I was in trouble when my lawyer insisted on anonymity."

"I've locked myself out, I don't suppose you could..."

Police Search: Man in swimming trunks manages to hide a lot of illegal items.

"Yours is the worst case of identity theft I've investigated."

"My goodness, Gurkenham! This is the worst case of identity theft I've ever seen!"

"It's a Mountie thing...we always get our man."

First space criminal investigation

"'Peeping Tom' seems so uncouth, I prefer 'neighbourhood watch.'"

Snowflake Identity Theft.

Cop Raid

"If a tree falls in the forest and hits a certain individual, would he still be able to testify?"

"I thought I could be a more effective prison reform advocate on the outside."

Home Shoplifting Network.

"We're from the middle class drug squad and you're nicked."