Crib Commander Gifts

Free the Downtown Three!

Coping with a strong-willed child

"Same old same old. How about you?"

'You're not confident at the water hole are you?'

TV-Man

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

"They're born into captivity, it's all they know."

"I tell you, it's a jungle out there!"

'Pretty please stay asleep till the morning,'

Busy day at the office.

Baby Race.

"Stay-at-home mom" is a misnomer. I spend ten hours a day driving kids all over town!

'Miss Johnson, would you mind ordering me another computer? And you can cancel that call to tech-support.'

A mother drives a mini-van full of kids; her bumper sticker reads "I'd rather be working".

"Just badly sprained thank goodness... I was so scared it might be broken..."

"Shouldn't you boys be out fighting crime somewhere?" "Yeah, yeah, whatever." "I could use another beer while you're up." "I ain't goin' on no airplane!" "Anyone pay the cable bill?" The A-Hole Team

"It's time to get the couch gutters cleaned again."

"There's got to be an easier way to lie around the house."

"Hush, little baby, don’t you cry ... ever."

Houdini's infancy.

Randolph maintains a stiff upper lip while the rest of him just goes to hell.

"Still judging people on stuff you could never do?"

"Still on your left."

"They think I don't have a clue."

"We've just crossed the line between binge viewing and OCD viewing."

"It's a stealth suit. So I can stay off the boss's radar."

'You went to obedience school and you're still not allowed on the couch? What a gyp.'

'Sweet dreams buddy!'

Colin attempts to be useful around the house didn't always have the desired effect.

Directors Chair and Others.

Naughty kids watching TV and telling their slack dad to go back to his kennel.

"Sky, sir?"

I'm not fussy! I'm stir-crazy!

Dummy Sucking Area

You've grazed the refrigerator, surfed the net, flipped the channels...for someone who doesn't move much, you sure do get around.