Creative Table Talk Gifts

'Instead of a tip, I wrote you a poem.'

Pirate boy reciting the alphabet

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

Boy makes snowman around a lamp post.

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

Resourceful toddler

"The meatloaf just tapped S.O.S. in Morse code."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

"You can build it with me, but you can't wreck it with me."

"Would you rather get hit by a racket or chewed by a dog?"

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'Is THIS the way you plan to spend your peak learning years?'

Child makes a toy and frightens himself.

Building Blocks.

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

Sorry, I've said all I can say in this medium.

"I'm afraid you have a condition called 'googly-eyes'."

"I believe I'll skip the appetizer. I ate the flowers."

'Because of the mess, 'Mr. Potato Salad-Head' never took off.'

'I'm still not sure HOW it happened. One minute, we were bouncing ideas off each other, and the next thing I knew, we were using furniture instead!'

'I sort of thought your presentation was going to be in powerpoint.'

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

Babble. Pbl. Babama. Bbb. Brb. Bod.

"Jonathan! I've told you not to put your space toys in the freezer and pretend they're on the ice planet!"

"I'm making pink lemonade!"

"Isn't it obvious? I'm writing the great American graphic novel."

"It's alive! Alive!!"

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

Advertising and PR Agency: 'I'm able to spin at 60 words per minute, hype at 50 words and distort at 45 words.'

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'