Crafty Party Host T-Shirts

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

Wine Lady

Dinner at the Trapdoors

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

'Ron's not drunk - he's pouting because we won't play Pictionary.'

'Seven layers in one dip? Gentlemen, what have we wrought?'

Pinata Trophies

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

Four olives and a toothpick on Newton's Cradle.

'Oh, Olivia, I just love your new caption! Where on earth did you find it?'

"If you dress in a costume that they can't figure out, they feel guilty and give you more candy."

"We're not laughing at you, sweetie. We're laughing at something you don't understand."

Mini Bar

Kid to kid: 'I can't be wearing out my welcome. I didn't even step on it.'

'... So I said to Dave; 'You're not going to wear that baggy old thing are you?' But, he decided to come nude anyway.'

'It's your babysitter, where do you keep your fire extinguisher?'

"Yeah, uh, maybe you're not cut out to be the 'sparkly' kind of vampire."

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

Roller Coasters

"Don't mention Pat Buchanan, pro or con."

"Let there be light hors d'oeuvres."

"'Host' and Cheese?"

Acupuncturist Society Cocktail Party - 'For heaven's sake, Brian, it's only a pineapple chunk!'

'He's been shot!'

'Who took the cork out of my lunch?'

"My bouche was not amused."

"Barry made the wine. I made the cheese."

Please Leave by 9

A Good Year.

An expedition to get ice for the party.

'Dear, of course no one can tell you what they think of the wine, you haven't told them how much it cost yet.'

'I guess it's true what they say: spirits just don't mix'

'This is the worst wine I've ever tasted--I'll take 20 cases.'