Quirky Dinner Party Host T-Shirts

"Dinner's ready! Everyone find a seat!"

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

Dinner at the Trapdoors

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

"Rump roast?"

"How fresh is the calamari?"

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

"Gesundheit!"

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

Periodic table for two. Chez LMN't

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'Giles is a surgeon who likes to bring his work home with him.'

"I feel like I'm cosplaying as a salad bar."

'I said, I don't know about you, but I'm a bit disappointed in the strolling musician.'

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"This meal tastes just like dog crap!"

"A little lamb please."

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

"Let that breathe a little. But not too much. My last bottle hyperventilated."

"Here's to a great post-meal nap."

'Who took the cork out of my lunch?'

'This soufle is hard.' - 'No it isn't, your teeth are soft.'

"My bouche was not amused."

"What do you mean, where's your order? Can't you see we're just starting to really cook?"

"Appetizer is almost done."

"One medium rare and one with honey."

'I began to worry when I saw the dressed crab moving sideways off the plate!'

'Side dishes? No, we find our carrion entrees are satisfying enough.'

'Do you have any wine from the Ming dynasty?'