Quirky Dinner Party Host T-Shirts

"Dinner's ready! Everyone find a seat!"

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

Dinner at the Trapdoors

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

"Rump roast?"

"How fresh is the calamari?"

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

"Gesundheit!"

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'Giles is a surgeon who likes to bring his work home with him.'

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"I feel like I'm cosplaying as a salad bar."

'I said, I don't know about you, but I'm a bit disappointed in the strolling musician.'

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

"A little lamb please."

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

"This meal tastes just like dog crap!"

"Let that breathe a little. But not too much. My last bottle hyperventilated."

'This soufle is hard.' - 'No it isn't, your teeth are soft.'

"My bouche was not amused."

"Here's to a great post-meal nap."

'Who took the cork out of my lunch?'

"Appetizer is almost done."

"One medium rare and one with honey."

'Well, you did say 'well done', Sir!'

'I began to worry when I saw the dressed crab moving sideways off the plate!'

'Do you have any wine from the Ming dynasty?'