Cracker Comedian Gifts

"The real question is do you really need a cracker?"

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

'Three weeks of brutal alimony negotiations, Polly, and you settle for a cracker!'

"Elementary, my dear Quackson."

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

'You reek of crackers.'

"Women like funny men, but you can't go on a date dressed like that!"

How The Ice Age Began: 'OK, can we freeze it right there...'

"I need a vacation. Everything is starting to smell like a bomb to me."

"Maybe I've been brainwashed, but at this point I do believe I actually want a goddamn cracker."

'Dear father for what I am about to receive I give thee thanks.'

'...And an extra packet of crackers! It's our Anniversary!'

'The beer's not cloudy, the glass is dirty.'

"I'd hate to see the flea big enough to wear those!"

Cover story: Oil Workers Monthly.

C is for Cracker

A parrot business meeting

'You're insecure because your data is unsecured.'

Polly want a cracker?

"That's just the meds kicking in."

Insulting Cashpoint

"My trun!!"

"Poor Sadie, this Pesach she finally cracked."

"D'ya wanna hear a secret? Well, keep it under your wrappings. . ."

'Where did you get the idea that crackers are a minimum daily requirement?'