Cracker Comedian Pillows

"The real question is do you really need a cracker?"

"What I'd give for a stimulating conversation..."

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"

'Three weeks of brutal alimony negotiations, Polly, and you settle for a cracker!'

"Elementary, my dear Quackson."

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

Dr. Saltine, pioneer of salt transplants.

Boy whistling at crackers.

"Here's a request from someone who'd like to hear something in tune for a change. Oh, we have a comedian out there, I see."

'You reek of crackers.'

"Women like funny men, but you can't go on a date dressed like that!"

How The Ice Age Began: 'OK, can we freeze it right there...'

"I need a vacation. Everything is starting to smell like a bomb to me."

'...And an extra packet of crackers! It's our Anniversary!'

"Maybe I've been brainwashed, but at this point I do believe I actually want a goddamn cracker."

'Dear father for what I am about to receive I give thee thanks.'

"I'd hate to see the flea big enough to wear those!"

'The beer's not cloudy, the glass is dirty.'

Cover story: Oil Workers Monthly.

Cracker nice, but Polly want more.

This next song is also about food. I probably don't even need to say that anymore, do I.

A parrot business meeting

C is for Cracker

'I need an officer to respond to a report of a stolen donut truck.'

'You're insecure because your data is unsecured.'

Polly want a cracker?

'I got this medal for being a Navy Seal.'

'Polly had a cracker.'

"My trun!!"

"That's just the meds kicking in."

How paper training can affect puppies...

Insulting Cashpoint

"Poor Sadie, this Pesach she finally cracked."

'Where did you get the idea that crackers are a minimum daily requirement?'

"D'ya wanna hear a secret? Well, keep it under your wrappings. . ."