Court Jester Of Sports Gifts

"We really need to communicate better."

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

TV jester.

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

'How about a game of cards?'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

COWS: Cow Pong

Beer Order

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"I say we move on to dessert."

A baby in court

"I don't think you can get a peace prize for ending a war that you started."

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

Basketball.

The Scones-Monkey Trial. I, Judge Sadie, am prepared to rule. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Intelligent design versus evolution. Borrrinnng. That is my legal finding. Appeal. Will all bipeds please rise.

Justice 4 Ron

Medieval headlines.

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'