Court Jester Of The Tennis World Gifts

'New balls please.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'How about a game of cards?'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

TV jester.

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

"I say we move on to dessert."

A baby in court

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

"I don't think you can get a peace prize for ending a war that you started."

Justice 4 Ron

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

Basketball.

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

The Scones-Monkey Trial. I, Judge Sadie, am prepared to rule. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Intelligent design versus evolution. Borrrinnng. That is my legal finding. Appeal. Will all bipeds please rise.

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

'It's all just an unfortunate misunderstanding, Your Honor, it was 'Talk Like a Pirate' day, and,,,,'

"Are you trying to show contempt for this court."

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."