Court Jester In Training Gifts

'All your spin doctors have come down with vertigo.'

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

"I always check twitter before work, to see if yesterday's joke got me the sack."

'How about a game of cards?'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

TV jester.

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

Supreme Court. It's either constitutional or unconstitutional - We don't use a scale of one to ten!

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

'Let it go, will you? -- That whoopie cushion incident was years ago!'

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

COWS: Cow Pong

"I say we move on to dessert."

A baby in court

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

"Another slander suit!"

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

Basketball.

The Scones-Monkey Trial. I, Judge Sadie, am prepared to rule. House of Java.net Cybercafe. Intelligent design versus evolution. Borrrinnng. That is my legal finding. Appeal. Will all bipeds please rise.

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

Justice 4 Ron

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

Medieval headlines.

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'