Courthouse Jester Gifts

"I'm sorry, Timothy, but there's no suing over spilt milk, either."

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'Court's in recess!'

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'How about a game of cards?'

"For the sake of not being redundant, your honor, I feel that one 'bad dog' is sufficient."

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

"He's actually my co-counsel, but you may scratch his head."

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

'Your Honor, my client would like to wave his right to a speedy trial.'

"Objection, your honor, my client's feelings are being hurt."

COWS: Cow Pong

"I say we move on to dessert."

A baby in court

'He's not called the 'Hanging About Judge' for nothing.'

Basketball.

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

'They named special prosecutors to investigate each other.'

"Just one more outburst and I can have this chicken tenderized."

Justice 4 Ron

Medieval headlines.

"Your Honor, prior to sentencing, if it please the court, I'd like to make just a few brief remarks about pâte brisée."

Portrait of a Serial Attorney.

'Court is in recess for one hour. Everyone convene on the playground and we will choose sides for dodgeball!'

'Oh, he's been a bad dog all right - why else would he lawyer up?'

'Your Honor, we've decided to go with the inanity defense...'

'That will be 100 hours of community service in some other community.'

"Twenty five years! But your honor,

'Radford, go in for Bloom. ... Uh-uh-uh! Finish your vegetables first!'

'It's all just an unfortunate misunderstanding, Your Honor, it was 'Talk Like a Pirate' day, and,,,,'