Counting Sheep Expert Gifts

'Nothing helps! If I count sheep, the first one has enterotoxemia...'

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

Support group for sheep.

Please Drove Carefully.

"Well, I'll miss him, but all his friends are backpacking Europe to herd sheep this summer, too."

"Here we go again. Look at me everybody....I'm a cloud."

Sheep Ledger

"Static cling."

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

'Sorry lady, can't help you: Yes, I can herd pretty much anything, but not cats, and certainly not kittens...'

'You're suffering from job-stress insomnia. Stop counting sheep to fall asleep.'

Going Down?

"It's harder to 'lead from the middle' than I thought."

"You can always count on me."

A Gated Community.

'I'm banging out some bitchin' bleats!'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

The Lawman

"Why do you call the new sheepdog Bra?"

"We're giving you our complete cooperation. There's no need to bark at us!"

'They used to be called sheep, and they produced wool. Now they're some sort of bioengineered creatures, and they produce antibiotics.'

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

'zzz sleep.'

"Yeah, I won the Finest Quality Wool award, but it was a tough competition: There were contestants from all over Australia and New Zealand..."

Sheepdog Security

First there were virtual-pets. Now there are virtual owners and ranchers.

Man has a dream about a clumsy sheep.

A sheep ordering in a restaurant - the sole item on the menu is grass.

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

'Tsk...woolly thinking again.'

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

'I so wish we had found the shears in the shipwreck...'