Counting Sheep Expert T-Shirts

'Nothing helps! If I count sheep, the first one has enterotoxemia...'

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

EWE 2.

Support group for sheep.

Please Drove Carefully.

"Well, I'll miss him, but all his friends are backpacking Europe to herd sheep this summer, too."

Sheep Ledger

No caption. (Man wearing a cast is in traction. He imagines sheep lining up to jump fence. Sheep also wear casts.)

"Here we go again. Look at me everybody....I'm a cloud."

"Static cling."

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

'Sorry lady, can't help you: Yes, I can herd pretty much anything, but not cats, and certainly not kittens...'

'You're suffering from job-stress insomnia. Stop counting sheep to fall asleep.'

Going Down?

"It's harder to 'lead from the middle' than I thought."

"You can always count on me."

A Gated Community.

"Why do you call the new sheepdog Bra?"

'I'm banging out some bitchin' bleats!'

Objects in mirror bear no relation to reality.

The Lawman

'They used to be called sheep, and they produced wool. Now they're some sort of bioengineered creatures, and they produce antibiotics.'

"We're giving you our complete cooperation. There's no need to bark at us!"

'How come this sheep tastes like sugar?'

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

"Yeah, I won the Finest Quality Wool award, but it was a tough competition: There were contestants from all over Australia and New Zealand..."

Sheepdog Security

'Tsk...woolly thinking again.'

'I so wish we had found the shears in the shipwreck...'

Man has a dream about a clumsy sheep.

"He's been like that ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

A sheep ordering in a restaurant - the sole item on the menu is grass.

The Shepherd's Staff. . .

First there were virtual-pets. Now there are virtual owners and ranchers.