Corniness Connoisseur Gifts

"Oh, it's just a corny old bee movie."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

baby sweetcorn...

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

The wonderful world of cheese.

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

"Trail mix?"

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"Sis, my teacher said to list the four food groups. . . but I can only think of three. Cookies, candy and ice cream!"

Baking

"He won't eat anything but corn."

"Gazelle's pizza! Delivered fast and delicious... Um, you guys aren't interested in pizza are you!?"

Dog Walker

Cereal Tasting.

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

'Prepare to meet your maker!'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Shaved Ice

"Made with a little extra TLC – and THC for good measure."

Instant Gratification Cafe.

"Can you keep a secret?"

Fig 1. Fig 2. Fig Newton.

"First Big Oil, the Big Steel, and now, Big Cookie."

'Mom, was it one or two cps of sugar?'

Future Wrestler

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."