Corniness Connoisseur T-Shirts

"Oh, it's just a corny old bee movie."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

baby sweetcorn...

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

The wonderful world of cheese.

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"Bad things happen to people who don't buy my cookies, Sir."

"Trail mix?"

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

Baking

"Sis, my teacher said to list the four food groups. . . but I can only think of three. Cookies, candy and ice cream!"

"Gazelle's pizza! Delivered fast and delicious... Um, you guys aren't interested in pizza are you!?"

Dog Walker

"I knew we'd eventually catch him. He can't run and run as fast as he once did."

"He won't eat anything but corn."

Tidy it up for the open house, and it wouldn't hurt to put out some freshly regurgitated worms. For sale.

"Made with a little extra TLC – and THC for good measure."

'Prepare to meet your maker!'

Sister to brother: 'It's kind of like alphabet soup, only for numbers crunchers.'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

Shaved Ice

Cereal Tasting.

Instant Gratification Cafe.

"Can you keep a secret?"

'Mom, was it one or two cps of sugar?'

Fig 1. Fig 2. Fig Newton.

"First Big Oil, the Big Steel, and now, Big Cookie."

'What are you giving up for Lent this year?' - 'Anchovies.' - 'I thought you hated anchovies?' - 'I do. Care for a cookie instead?' - 'Lent is supposed to be about challenge and sacrifice!' - 'Play to win, Baby!'

Future Wrestler

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."