Computer Screen Warriors Gifts

"You know those eyeballl rotations you do to relieve computer eye-strain...don't do them in front of customers"

Lynching on social media

"This isn't exactly what I had in mind when I told you to go outside and play."

"Just one more site!" "I'm totally, like, in control!" "I can quit anytime I feel like it..."

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

"Hang on. Mommy's just checking to see if she's still relevant to the outside world."

"Gosh, I can't believe it's been over 25 years since our company was dragged, kicking and screaming, into the digital age!"

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

'Bring me another coffee would you...'

"Great idea. Movies are so much better on the big screen."

"No. I've never had any problems with my kids not paying attention to me."

Weapons of War Through the Ages.

'Hurry, it's having a nervous breakdown!'

"Kids, look at the weather! Why don't you play outside?"

Cyberwarfare

"and when they woke up, the kids discovered that the house had just one 19", black & white TV that only got... 3 channels."

"This is Jim's second speech on how not to make people mad by talking on your phone. I missed his first speech."

"It's only insomnia if there's nothing good on."

"Hi...I was just phoning to see if you got my e-mail?"

"The coffee is free, but now we rent the tables."

"It's a really cool game! You're Bill Gates, and you have to fight off the evil agents of the Justice Department before they destroy your planet."

"Got some bad news for you, Larry."

"When they said I'll get unlimited calls and texts with my new mobile contract, I didn't realise they would all be from PPI insurance companies....."

STRIP Hambone: Computer language

"I want to get in touch with my inner child. I need the tech support."

"Your family called. When you get caught up, they'd like you to send them a proof of life."

Facebook's business model

"Going out to play? Get back to the computer and start e.gaming!"

"How long do you think it'll take before he realizes I took his phone away?"

Wringing the Monitor

"So...As I was saying, nothing will actually change..."

'Don't you know too much TV is bad for your eyes...and your morals, attention span, intelligence...'

"Sorry, I double-booked. This wouldn't happen if I had a computer - but they insist we do everything by hand."

'It's not his name - It's what he does all the time.'

"Pull over and check your phone" "Once more for good luck" "Maybe just another teensy look"