Company Loyalty Gifts

'Before the meeting starts let's all sing the company song.'

I like the Jets...I guess

Others will fight for you

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

"Just gotta wait 'till she wakes up."

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

"Who do you like in the super bowl?"

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

"Cheer up, Simon. . . I'm always here for you!"

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

"I'm supposed to be loyal, relieve stress, be 'Man's best friend'...I don't need this kind of pressure!"

"These guys stink. They're the worst team I've ever seen! What a bunch of losers!"

"Please feel free to browse."

"I don’t know what it is, but every time the Bruins win, I love you more and more!"

"No matter the weather or what's on my plate, I'm here at five. That's discipline."

"Can I interest you in our frequent flyer scheme?"

"I need for you to go to bat for me again, Tim. And this time, could you do it without adjusting yourself?"

'I want someone who'll not just take the firms line, but the hook and sinker, too.'

I don't want to buy anything. I don't want to upgrade. Watch this! What are you doing? Looking at an ad for the new Mac laptop. My heart's not racing! What's wrong with me?! It is sleek.

'While we appreciate company loyalty, Larson, you should really be in the hospital.'

"I hate to break it to you, but you weren't his best friend."

"This is as far as your air miles take you."

The whole club stands behind the coach...

"Wow, you've got tons of loyalty points. Someone's a good boy!"

"As a reward for 25 years of faithful service, here's your new cubical...it's 8% bigger!"

"At least you get to wake up from your nightmares."

"I know he is now our richest client but he is very loyal!"

'Uh oh, looks like he had a tough day at the office: Let's jump around to cheer him up...'

"And THEN, and THIS is the CLEVER bit...We put our advertising logo on the front of all our clothing and make people PAY for the privilege."

'And how many frequent flyer miles do you have?'