Communication Escapist Gifts

"He definitely doesn't want to see anybody."

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

Invasion of Privacy

Bo're'droom

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

"I can hardly wait...TWO WHOLE weeks without having to deal with mindless e-mails, incessant interruptions, boring meetings...."

"I think we're all agreed that we need to focus 110% on meeting strategic corporate goals."

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

"Is there an option to make my out-of-office message permanent?"

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

"Could I please go back to the rack now?"

'I was so angry, I got up and tip-toed out of the meeting. I probably should've stomped.'

"Slowly begin to reawaken the body with thoughts of unread E-mails, piles of dirty laundry, and the kids you have to pick up from school."

"Outta my way. I need to check my email!"

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

"I'm not lazy. I'm resting before I get tired."

Cyber Dream

"When catch-up TV finally catches up"

Spam.

'Where do you expect to see yourself in five lifetimes?'

SEMINAR CANCELLED: Feel free to doodle.

'The trick is to make them feel better about themselves without actually paying them any better...'

I'd like to order a power outage. Huh? My wife's on her phone all day, my son plays video games nonstop. My boss finds me by email wherever and whenever. My pager rings 'round the clock! Say again? I was text messaging. Pull the plug, man!

Hot Towel Web Service

Academics at the Beach: Professor Wilson receives his email messages by the use of willpower alone.

Some days Ted's head would get stuck for hours.

"Master, you have 175,568 unread messages in your inbox."

"And in order to align the designated objectives withthe fiscally driven cross functional departmental...did you understand any of that?" "Only the blah! blah! bit."

"Don't you dare try to sneak out of this cartoon!"

"Let me assure you voters that my life is an open email...at least it is since that last Russian cyber attack."

"Gee... A wide screen, high-definition TV with Stereo-Gasm Sound and over 500 channels! It's almost like having a life!"

Spam.