Comical Misadventure Fan Gifts

'First time skiing?'

Welcome to Stratford-On-Avon...Birthplace of William Shakespeare...Park not here, lest ye be towed!

"No, a dressing down day isn't an opportunity to bollock the staff."

"If the jumper cables don't work, I'll pour more motor oil on the keys."

Man is injured transporting cacti.

"Over the river and through a ridiculous detour that has us in the middle of who-knows-where, to Grandfather’s house we go!"

Parisian Misguided Tours.

'Sorry about that, Miss Delsey. I guess the boat wasn't sinking after all.'

"I thought you said you were dating a rich doctor!"

'That's not what I meant when I asked you to add a second bathroom, Roger.'

'I could have sworn you asked if I wanted to go to the saloon.'

"Why is it that the laws of inevitability always seem higher on ladies day?"

'Holy shit!'

One of the dangers of being new to online banking.

Painting into a corner.

Embarrassed man finds a skimpy dress in his suitcase.

"It wasn't long into their first date before Toro began to notice the red flags."

Bad Medieval first dates.

"It ran amok."

'Now that's what I call a tourist trap.'

'Yup, I think mine are broke too.'

"There was no large metal object in your rib cage after all. Turns out I was just seeing this old-timey doctor thing on my forehead."

"Hey—nice place!"

Dog Show: 'Bad news Muffy - you're being disqualified on a technicality.'

"Is that enough off the top?"

'I need a small, temporary tax hike - I found a great investment opportunity in Nigeria.'

'I have come to say we love you all and want you all to succeed. Wait! . . . Wrong locker room. My bad.'

'Please excuse my nurse -- this is her first day on the job.'

'That shark took Bob right out of the boat! Now I'll never get the $50 he owes me.'

'Nice catch, idiot!'

'first it was bankruptcy,then I totaled my four-wheeler,then my marriage.Now the magic has gone out of casting.'

Jenny has a mid-lithe crisis.

The Gods breathed life into the wrong one.