Medieval Misadventures Fan Gifts

Bad Medieval first dates.

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"I'm sure you'll grow into it, darling."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

Frontispiece to the first volume of 'Master Humphrey's Clock'

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

"We're following Carrot Top."

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

Knight feeding his kids.

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"Take this declaration of war and punch it up."

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

Servant brings king skateboard on pillow.

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"He's his own worst enemy."

"The peasants are revolting Sire."

"When I ask questions, I expect answers!"

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

'Isn't it cute the way they compete so hard?'

TV jester.

A bridge builder using an organic blow torch.

"If you let down your guard, I'll walk over the moat."

"Honey, where did you put my Green Lantern cufflinks?!"

"The knights of the round accent table"

"Early model of baggage claim"

Joust Sharpener

"Oh great, the printer is down."

underwater knight

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

Sir gawain had been duped....it was a damson in distress

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

'He's been brought in to save the company.'