Comedic Guru Gifts

'I bet I can extinguish my ego before you extinguish YOUR ego!'

"Complaining empowers us."

'The humor I'm working into my talk is cracking me up.'

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

Wedding Day Itinerary.

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

Candid Camera store.

It isn't widely known that Michelangelo was the first in a long line of cartoonists to buck the family tradition.

'I can make out the nude, but I don't see the submarine.'

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

Visual Gag: An about to be married Bride using a real train as a wedding gown train

"Call me 'pops' one more time and I'll lace 'ya one!"

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

'What have you got for the man who knows everything?'

"Rapunzel's gone punk."

"Boss, I guarantee you that my intentions with your daughter are serious."

'Let's call him lucky!'

"I'll be a bit late... sorry."

Man walking a long dog on a fishing rod.

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

"She bathes him. She feeds him. She burps him. Mother's a real micromanager."

"You never laugh at my jokes... "

Thumbing a Lift.

Genetic Fingerprinting.

"That's enough about the noggin and the schnoz. Let's move on to the tummy-wummy and the keister."

'A new musical - Einstein's quest - rehearsal'

Musical genres

'Don't call the Nobel Committee just yet: We forgot to calibrate the instruments before the experiment...'

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

"Extra large sanitary pads and extra small ones, pads for the night..."

After I crossed the road, I began to ask myself why I did anything.

"Since when isn’t a taxidermied animal a comfort pet?" "Since forever!" "Dang it!"

'Ick! -- I'd never vote for anybody with hair like THAT!'

"Mum can you come home quick, dad's started to make an exhibition of himself again!"