Comedic Canine Lover Gifts

'Well, I don't happen to believe you went there.'

'He can do 'roll over' and 'beg,' but he does 'sit' best.'

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Why can't you just dig things up like normal dogs?"

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

'You'll be getting $5,000 worth of doggy treats this week. If your owner sees the charge on his credit card, you don't know me.'

Man wearing T-Shirt saying 'Dog's Best Friend'

"I think what he's trying to tell you, dear, is that he doesn't quite care for the cheaper dog food!"

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

"Do you prefer lavender scent or strawberry?"

The Rolling Bones

He Did It!

'Do you have to do that every time?'

"Oh, God, am I housebroken."

'You look lovely, but we need to lengthen your train a bit...'

"You'd like a second opinion? Okay, I think you should stay off the furniture too."

"I only know 'Sit' and 'Stay.' "

"Pet peeves" "I fear the cat." "I fear the cat" "I fear the cat." "Fecced me."

"You're not a bad dog for driving. You're a bad dog for not wearing a seat belt."

'Pointless Pets: A ceramic tiled giraffe.'

'You wish, Timmy.'

"I want you to be open and honest and to not leave any hair on the couch."

"New tricks CD Rom"

'You think one is tough, try raising two!'

'Not me...I'm watching my cholesterol!'

'There's no evidence use of steroids will improve dog show performance.'

'Holy S**t!'

'Clown fish ... '

"It's finally fur coat weather."

'I sent Ben to fly fishing school, now he's a menace to the whole stream!'

"I chase my tail, roll in stuff, howl at the moon. What kind of life is that?"

"Well, you'll just have to put your foot down and tell him he's not a lap dog!"

"We're in for the night."

"My owner's been teaching me how to beg. . . I've made £30 today!"

'What am I blind, Bob?'