Comedic Canine Enthusiast Gifts

'Look, I never said I was filthy rich. I said I was rolling in it.'

"Oh, God, am I housebroken."

"It's finally fur coat weather."

'I sent Ben to fly fishing school, now he's a menace to the whole stream!'

Describe yourself.

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Why can't you just dig things up like normal dogs?"

"I have a couple of other projects I'm excited about."

'You'll be getting $5,000 worth of doggy treats this week. If your owner sees the charge on his credit card, you don't know me.'

Man wearing T-Shirt saying 'Dog's Best Friend'

"I think what he's trying to tell you, dear, is that he doesn't quite care for the cheaper dog food!"

"Come on... you love knocking things off the counter!"

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

"Do you prefer lavender scent or strawberry?"

RING! RING! RING!: 'Not the cell phone AGAIN!'

'Do you have to do that every time?'

He Did It!

'You look lovely, but we need to lengthen your train a bit...'

"You'd like a second opinion? Okay, I think you should stay off the furniture too."

"Pet peeves" "I fear the cat." "I fear the cat" "I fear the cat." "Fecced me."

"You're not a bad dog for driving. You're a bad dog for not wearing a seat belt."

"I only know 'Sit' and 'Stay.' "

"I want you to be open and honest and to not leave any hair on the couch."

'You wish, Timmy.'

'Pointless Pets: A ceramic tiled giraffe.'

'There's no evidence use of steroids will improve dog show performance.'

'You think one is tough, try raising two!'

'Not me...I'm watching my cholesterol!'

'Well, I don't happen to believe you went there.'

'Holy S**t!'

'Clown fish ... '

'He can do 'roll over' and 'beg,' but he does 'sit' best.'

"Well, you'll just have to put your foot down and tell him he's not a lap dog!"

"We're in for the night."

"My owner's been teaching me how to beg. . . I've made £30 today!"