Cold Weather Survivalist Gifts

"I don't care if your ears are freezing. Get those covers off!"

Crowded Ice Fishing

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

"Al, you've been chosen Businessman of the Year by the Junior Chamber of Commerce."

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

'My purse! The original 24-hour pharmacy.'

'It's the abominable snowman!'

"We should never take walks like this more often."

Pop Top Ice FIshing

'You'll have to excuse Gerald - he suffers from Seasonal Affected Disorder' (Naked man in arm chair in living room)

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

"Daddy's taking him to the woodshed, again!"

Wally flunks the test: The Emergency Broadcast System.

'Dave will only turn the heating on when he thinks it's absolutely necessary.'

Trawling for Fish.

'Here's an interesting article. 'Cold or Seasonal Allergy?''

'It's the worst possible diagnosis a bear can receive -- sleep apnea.'

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

"That's the worst case of Cabin Fever that I've ever seen. Luckily, spring is right around the corner."

'Wait! Don't get in. . . It's totally cold.'

Running out of Gas.

"For years after Vietnam, I woke up screaming about the cold weather in Toronto."

Man in artic weather playing sport with snow balls

"Happens at least once every ice fishing season."

I think he's spent his whole career studying this one Great Lake just so he can say he has "superior knowledge"! Duluth.

"Before someone says anything, yes, it was a long winter."

'Well, so much for whale-whispering.'

"Brrr - it was so cold today I had my hands in my own pockets instead of someone elses!"

'I had a nest egg once, but I sat on it too long, and ended up with nothing but a frozen asset.'

'I see a lot of that at this time of year...you've got a nasty case of cabin fever!'

'How can you tell?'

Man looking at his shower-bath on a cold morning

'Well sure, YOU'VE got brakes on FOUR wheels!'

"Help me! I'm trapped. In a dead end job."

'Get the 'extra hold' bear spray. I want to look good when we come out of hibernation.'