Winter Survival Gifts

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

'You'll have to excuse Gerald - he suffers from Seasonal Affected Disorder' (Naked man in arm chair in living room)

"Just think how much we could save if we switched the heating off altogether."

'Tough winter.'

"You know that's a waste of time, just chuck it on the fire to keep us warm."

"If this doesn't work I'll turn on the heat."

All New Winter Olympic Events

"OK then, I admit it. Installing the log burner was a bad idea!"

"You'll thank me when you see the heating bill."

'Yeah sure it's cooking us from the inside out, but think of all the money we'll save on heating.'

"Well, we've done it, Sandy . . . we hit the 'cold snap tri-fecta:'. . ."

Keeping warm this winter...

"You're right—there's no such thing as personal space in a hibernaculum."

'I'll be glad when winter is over and he can start buryi8ng bones again.'

'You mean to tell me you forgot where you buried dinner?'

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

'I was thinking-what if the tide's OUT?'

'My purse! The original 24-hour pharmacy.'

"Daddy's taking him to the woodshed, again!"

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

"You see, honey, no lousy coronavirus is gonna get to us way out here."

'Dave will only turn the heating on when he thinks it's absolutely necessary.'

'Here's an interesting article. 'Cold or Seasonal Allergy?''

'It's the worst possible diagnosis a bear can receive -- sleep apnea.'

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

"That's the worst case of Cabin Fever that I've ever seen. Luckily, spring is right around the corner."

"Before someone says anything, yes, it was a long winter."

"For years after Vietnam, I woke up screaming about the cold weather in Toronto."

The World's best Camouflage Store.

"Brrr - it was so cold today I had my hands in my own pockets instead of someone elses!"

'I see a lot of that at this time of year...you've got a nasty case of cabin fever!'

"Yes, I do know how to light a fire with two sticks... Provided one of them is a match."

How to save on your heating bill...

'Get the 'extra hold' bear spray. I want to look good when we come out of hibernation.'

St Bernard Toilet Holder