Club Member Gifts

Alfred Marquez, Probate Attorney - Heir club for men.

"You'll learn a lot at our book club...like how to read between the wines."

Men drinking

'Social Climber' "Please can I join your golf club"

'It's a deal -- I'll introduce a bill to bail out your country club, and you'll introduce a bill to bail out my country club!'

'Forgetting 'Stripes Day' is not something this club takes lightly, Mrs. Federson.'

Founder of the Emoticon Club

"Welcome, comadres, to this first meeting of the Very Wise Latina League!"

'He's the only one we could get to be master of ceremonies.'

'I read the Club's constitution and then realized I did fit the entry criteria, so I decided to join...'

Maybe we should stop calling it 'The Masters.'

'I'd recommend another teabag or two - The tea club's demanding a refund.'

'Boy Scouts aren't ANY kind of terrorists!'

'It suprises me you want your files organized.

Time Travellers Club: Back in 1652.

Male Nudist Club

'…and remember - around HERE, ‘talk is CHEEP'.'

"I hope you're good, Charlie. I've only played a couple of times."

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

"You're way too strong Dad: You've overshot the green by about two hundred metres..."

A bunch of global warming skeptics want to join eco club. It's a school organization. You have to let them in. But they just want to harass us with selective facts! Today: Eco club. So? Debate is good. You have :An Inconvenient Truth" to counter their arguments. Oh. Great. Now we'll have to read it.

". . . and that dumb Mrs. Parker could have figured I had the Ace, King and Jack, but no, she goes ahead bidding in hearts. . ."

"This poem was written at a time in my life when I wrote a poem."

Man sleeping with newspaper at gentlemen's club

Geek wears T-shirt that points to his friend and says: 'I'm with someone who fails to grasp the key principles of modular representation theory.'

'What a huge disappointment. I thought French Club was about kissing!'

I'm warning you. My nosy parents are chaperoning. It'll be fine. Eco Club Dance. All they want to do is spy on me. You're safe. You think? Is that Twig? I forgot my night-vision goggles.

Bud's Club...Where Buds, Bubs and Bros gather!

'Actually, we're members of a mountain climbing club named for sir Edmund Hillary.'

"Howard, you've met my ukulele ladies before."

'That's Kevin Hurley. He wants us to know he's an Eagle Scout.'

'I just joined the Freemasons and I'm afraid you're our next sacrifice..'

'Be wormier!'

We couldn't convince the football players to give up their bottled water. Hmpf. As eco club president

"You only started bringing me home from the Darby and Joan club because I had a stair life and you couldn't manage stairs any more."