Clown Phobia Club Member Gifts

"Like you, I laugh at most things, but not clowns: They terrify me!"

Children's Parties

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

"And I want you to meet Coco, your anesthesiologist."

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

Dead Funny

'What clan do you belong to?'

Hey. Hey. Polly wants some folly.

'I'm looking fo someone who can make me laugh.'

'What? You ate the gateau instead of throwing it into my face?? You insensitive, egotistical brute! You don't love me anymore!'

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

Clown Ministry Baptism Today

Stepping on clown's shoe...

"I don't think you're taking this relationship seriously..."

"Hey, just wanted to say bye again, guys, I'm off to join the circus."

Clown Wife

'Would you like a balloon with that?'

"I'm sorry, Chuckles. We had to remove your funny bone."

'My god! Have you seen the size of this chiropodist's bill?!!'

Clown answers the door to a custard pie in the face.

Laxatives - "I'm after some comic relief."

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

'You got clowns in your engine. That's what's making them funny noises.'

Our founder: Custard pies Ltd.

'The pills stopped your depression but we may need to adjust the dosage, Sister Naomi.'

Clown walks balloon dog

"Seriously?"

Hot Dog Animals: $2

Only Clowns

'Another balloon animal? And who do you think ends up taking care of these?'

'Our CEO's philosophy is that a happy environment means a happy bottom line.'

Monster Clown