Classic Storytelling Fan Gifts

"CBD… oil… CBD… oil…"

The Fourth Little Pig

Saint George and the Drag Queen

'Yes, all at once!'

"Bram Stoker's Bambi"

Little Buttercup HMS Pinafore

"Recalculating route..."

Thomas Hardy

This side is the gag reel.

"Only one pailful? Did they have water restrictions like we do?"

Moby Dick

Malaprop Man! Adventures. Malaprop Man! Where have you been? At a stupor her comet confection! Did many of your fellow heroes show up? We had a great turnabout! Backman and the Incredible Bulk were there! So was Caption Americ, the Flush, Wander Woman and Plasterman! Very impressive. Who was the most popular with the fans? I think I was the main distraction! I have no doubt at all about that!

Upper West Side Story

Ask A Silly Question.

"Underwater Childbirth Ward."

"At lease we managed to stop the leak before the water reached 'E' Deck."

Mom dwarves.

"You don't think this could be construed as ironic do you?"

Romulus and Remus

"Well, how was I supposed to know you were saving them for something special?"

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

"Expedition log #57: Like the rest of the week, I expect today will be another uneventful day."

Pirates find out treasure is a piggy bank.

"I can write, but I can't draw."

'Tarzan of the Kangaroos'

God's Double Whammy.

Bertolt Brecht

Red riding hood giving the wolf a complex

'Forget it! — I'm not sailing all the way back to Europe just to get you a box of crackers!'

"Pop, tell me again how Jazz came up the river from New Orleans."

"Boy, am I out of breath. I had to run crying 'Wee, wee, wee!' all the way home."

'It's an unauthorized biography of the Chief.'

Updated Fairy Tales Cinderella. My lawyers won't let me do glass slippers anymore --- Too many liability issues.

"I conjured you up a dress, shoes, a corsage, and a limo—I'm not ponying up for an afterparty too."

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!