Class Philosopher Gifts

'The global positioning system says we're on the border between middle class and lower middle class.'

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

'When I grow up, I'm either going to be an authority figure or an unimpeachable source.'

"Could I ask just one question?"

(When I'm good I'm very very good, but when I'm bad I'm... Well….) (Horrid?)

"I feel I've outgrown this facility, Mrs. Thompson. Could we see what else is around?"

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

'Amazing! We truly do live in a classless society.'

'So what are you studying, young man?'

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

"I got all 'Cs', but I call that an 'A' report card...'A' for 'Average.'"

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

'Dad, when do I stop being a wholly owned subsidy of you and Mom?'

Philosopher trading cards.

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

"Nicole’s parents celebrated her curious mind, even in those moments when it really depressed them."

"If everything is God's will, tell me again why I need to study for exams?"

"The answer you seek can be found in the syllabus."

Student - Haven't emailed in 2 days.

'Well, so my grades are A,B,C,D... at least I'm learning my alphabet.'

"One can be against entitlements, and still feel a sense of entitlement."

Young Galileo

"I'm tardy? Whew! I was afraid I was going to be late for school!"

"It's one thing for the National Commission to comment on the quality of teaching in our schools. It's another thing entirely for you to stand up and call Mr. Costello a yo-yo."

'He's into Proust as only a child can be.'

'Grownups are stupid! How can you be good and have fun?'

"I like to consider Third Grade as just another life hack."

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

Grass: We lost some good men today!

'There is NO way I can perform under that kind of pressure!'

'I hardly expected the federal tapering affect my allowance.'