City Life Satirist Gifts

"I'm not Santa, kid-I'm just an overweight hipster with a bag full of dumpster garbage."

"Thank god we're out of the city."

"This is all we have available. It has an accordian front door, a shelf, a phone, and a spectacular view."

'Do you think there's still a culture of sexism in the city?'

Dept. of Traffic Disruption.

'It's an idea whose time has come, Mr. Mayor -- 'drive-through traffic court'!'

This is where Brent council sends you

Hoodie Hang-out

"Food delivery for 2a and 6c. Burglary for 3b."

"Tight......this isn't tight...now a New York City apartment......that's tight."

"I thought they were cracking down on jaywalking."

"Excuse me, Doc, my attention wandered. What type of deficit disorder did you say I had?"

'I use my Blackberry all the time to check the competition's executive bonuses.'

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

Snowman Driver

"I don't care if it does have wifi. . . it's a vegetable peeler!"

Suburban street.

'I thought you said, 'What happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom'!'

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

This site acquired for yet another housing development.

Straddling bus stop above a regular bus stop.

How much for the lamp post?

"O.K., but let's say you have up to six hundred intruders per minute."

Autumn Leaves

Traffic Lights Medicine

'I really think you should check your pools, sir.'

'What's the antidote for espresso?'

"Jeremy sits in his hi-tech car all day and telecommutes from our driveway."

This is our proposal for your new housing development. We've chosen to call it The Meadows.

Lex Ave Express

"In the future, everyone will be famous for fifteen episodes."

"We will now observe a moment of silently checking our BlackBerrys."

Intentional Community vs. Community of Sheer Happenstance

'This IS our retirement plan.'

"No need to set out traps, I'm leaving. You don't have Wi-Fi in this dump."