City Cashier Gifts

'If I paid my sewer bill, how long would it take to get my water back on?'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

"Our new automated workers need a little fine tuning, but they're coming along..."

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

'Let's try this church. They welcome all denominations!'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

Not much money, glory, or praise

Fries and kids

'I love it when you talk big bucks, Mr. Williams.'

Casino. Keno. $$$. Win. Cashier. He sure wins a lot! He's "Keno Savvy."

'My phone number, Social Security number and Zip Code, just to buy gum? They didn't ask me that many questions when I joined the army.'

"The checkout clerk will now testily remind you to press 'ok'."

Self-Checkout.

'Well you checked my £20 note so I'm checking the change you gave me!'

'Oh, hello Dave. Would you like that in untraceable, used notes, like last time?'

60 minutes I.Q. test - pick the counterfeit.

'I applied the instant rebate and the returning customer loyalty reward, so that comes to fifty cents.'

"You have $3,098 in the bank? I'm impressed! So...do you think about investing it?"

'Having a family life and juggling two jobs? Isn't that a contradiction in terms?'

"This is Piggly Wiggly, what'd you expect?"

They think they're so great just because they're worth more! Petty cash.

Economic Prosperity

Piggy Bank ATM

Fries with that Burgers: 'I lost my job to robot in Japan.'

"I just audited our books. Your register came up five cents short, Rudy."

Retail Worker's Thanksgiving

"If you can't take it with you, this must be Hell."

One latte? That'll be $4.50. That apple fritter sounds good. I'll have that too. Ok. Anything else? No, that's it. Are you sure? Of course I'm sure. That's all. That'll be $9.00 even. Ooh, are those macaroons fresh? I'll have a macaroon too. One latte, one apple fritter and one macaroon, and that's it. Well what are you waiting for? I don't have all day.

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"

"You can go home now, Barmpot - we've balanced."

"Because it's got a goddam crack in it, that's why."