Church Repairs Gifts

Vicar prays for money for church repairs.

Jack of all trades

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

Tool Box

Bless me father, for I have sinned...my brother did it.'

The Gardener's Calendar: Try to Repair It...

"Remember now, anything is DIY-abe if you just do it yourself."

'You'll never believe this - they've found the actual body of Jesus!'

"We should start a church where we only read the parts of the bible that are never read in church."

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

'So it's with a heavy heart that I leave you good people of St. Paul's and accept the calling to be minister at the Sunnydell Nudist Colony...'

'What he said about judgement day is scary. Maybe we should find a good lawyer.'

Hardware Store Tools Wrench

A DIY disaster.

Lady about the cross: 'Now that all of us have trusted Christ, this is our family tree.'

"Reverend, I recommend you turn the other cheek."

Cleric with bible briefcase.

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"

"...and for today only, you'll get 10% off all tithing!"

"It's just temporary, until I fix the air conditioner."

"Freshly ground pepper?"

'Fixed the leg on the telly yet?'

"When it comes to fixing his own computer, I call it his PDDIY project. That stands for please DON'T do it yourself."

We're willing to flee temptation, if we can leave a forwarding address.

'Let us pray...'

Ernie likes to fix things around the house. Just today he's fixed two sandwiches, three sundaes, and some microwave brownies.

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

"Are there any here today who feel this union is not in the best interests of baseball?"

'What's the best kind of glue to fix a TV screen?'

Dance of the Red (Papal) Shoes.

'It's good to see you, Mr. McWit, but you do realize that today is neither Christmas or Easter?'

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

Clown Ministry Baptism Today