Child Pageantry Pillows

'I'm happy to announce that the international society of child-pageant parents will be relocating here next year.'

Miss America IQ Pageant

"Why, Vicar, I'm Eve in the Garden of Eden, surely..."

'I'm looking for a good summer looks....I can't read yet.'

Miss Advertising transformed in the dressing room.

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

Circus Pageant

"Congratulations to Miss Jupiter."

'You guys like to get into the holiday spirits?'

'...If you really loved me, you'd transfer me to a preschool with a winning team.'

5lbs + 5lbs= ?

Model's aspirations

"Poor lady, she never wins these pageants. She has a really weird run."

Woman wearing Miss 1977 sash: 'Things pretty much went downhill from there.'

'I wonder if I would be allowed to wear a baseball cap.'

Miss America IQ pageant.

'In our class's Christmas pageant, I'm playing the department store manager.'

Favorite author? Whoever wrote the Bible.

'As the new Miss Individual I shouldn't care what you think.'

Beauty Contest

'Welcome to the Miss Universe Pageant! And for the 62nd year in a row, Miss Bermuda is mysterious missing!'

'I could wile away the hours / Conferrin' with the flowers / Consultin' with the rain...'

"Hi. My name is Tanya and, if elected, my agenda will be cheddar! Cheddar, cheddar, cheddar!!"

Blank Inside

Miss Jumbo Queen Pageant.

Uncle Tom

7th annual weird fishes pageant

"I'm Miss Missouri, but my goal is to become Miss California."

"Do you suppose she's Miss Egypt?"

Sweet bird of youth annual pageant

Dreams of being a beauty queen