Chemistry Buff Gifts

Andy Oxidant meets Free Radical.

Scientists Eyes Test

'Chemists love it. It goes very well with most food additives we use.'

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

"I just made this for you, it's oxytocin."

'We breathe oxygen in the daytime, what do we breathe at night?' 'Nitrogen.'

Thank you for not doing research that has already been done.

Molecules You Ought to be Aware of.

It finally happened, models so thin they only consist of few molecules.

"Don't you think listing the contents as hydrogen, hydrogen and oxygen may be seen as a little pretentious?"

"Oh, oh - it's getting into organic."

It seems there is a difference between a "hypothesis" and a "guesstimate."

'It's not quite ready. Come back in 15 minutes.'

Lab safety Rule No. 1

"Mom lets me eat my fill of junk food as long as I can pronounce all the chemical ingredients."

He's our most reliable researcher...highly stable and chemically inert.

'You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't.'

'Can you feel the electricity in the air?...'

Chemical Company has graphs for 'organic' and 'inorganic' materials.

'I thought he would run all sorts of scientific tests.'

"No one is looking. I'll just add a little mercury nitrate."

Crazy Scientist

"I'd like to know why we're selling elements to the companies, and then turn around and buy compounds from them."

Dmitri Ivanovich Mendeleev: "At the...conference, four of my colleagues were standing side by side. Kiosk weighed 140 pounds..."

William Henry Perkin: "I never quite made it...suddenly I'm in the coal-tar dye business."

Employment recruitment aptitude test

'Risk assessor' in laboratory

Front row, L. to R.: Organic, pharmacology, polymer, inorganic agrochemical. Back row: Analytical, radiochemical, environmental, biochem, industrial.'

'I'm your guardian angel, and I think it's time you knew that for the past 37 years you've been barking up the wrong tree.'

"But you both can't be the 'father' of Ammonium Pentoxide Phosphate."

"Fe" is the chemical symbol for iron. I like that! Like iron, we're strong and dependable! AC It always seem to get cooler when they're around. IQ They're smart. They raise the level of conversation. OK Be careful around them! Like that, they're very agreeable. KO But then they switch around and punch somebody into unconsciousness!

Science Fair Judgements

"So that's what they mean by organic chemistry."

"For water it's: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O because yesterday you said it was H2O."

'I thought he would run all sorts of scientific tests.'