Chat Group Aficionado Gifts

'I don't care what your chat group says. I say you're becoming overly dependent on technological gadgetry.'

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'Now, keep in mind that these numbers are only as accurate as the fictitious data, ludicrous assumptions and wishful thinking they're based upon!'

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

'I don't like Gerald as a person, but I like him as a concept.'

Woman on the phone.

EXTROVERTS ANONYMOUS

Communication

"I'm not really into organized religion, though I am very spiritual."

Boys and Girls: Differences in Internet Surfing.

'Who's a pretty boy! Is that all you've got to say?'

"Our first order of business will be the new speed bump in the parking lot."

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

'Mr. Bigmeister likes to start each meeting with the pledge of allegiance.'

"I'm so sorry, there is nothing I can do for him anymore...he must have been offline for at least 10 hours..."

"My meeting take away was this chair, what did you get?"

"Call a meeting, Miss Pendleton. I want to hear some Corporate Creole."

'As a teleworker Colin sometimes struggled against feelings of isolation.'

"It's just a dinner table conversation. Must you refer to it as 'Talking Off-line'."

'Let's make this a short meeting. I know we all have expensive homes to go to.'

Pete's trying to groom himself"

'Life! Give my conversation liiiife!'

'Take us out to the ball game, take us out with the crowd, buy us some peanuts and crackerjacks, we don't care if never get back...'

Internet Dude

With the exception of the cold coffee and poor selection of donuts, I think the meeting went well.

Mamet Bedtime Stories

The phantom of the Oprah.

"This company lacks leadership... We need to think about the possibility of setting up a policy group to look at the option of convening a focus group to have a bit of a chat about what we might do!"

'For a romantic anniversary I thought we'd go back to where we first met.'

Testimonial from cyberspace.

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

Bob searched far and wide for his soul mate. It looked promising, aside from the language barrier and shipping costs.