Chaos Conquering Captain Gifts

Potty Training.

"Give a sh*t" "Don't give a sh*t"

What My Day Feels Like

'It wasn't long before Larry realized his calling as a lawyer whisperer...'

'What was all that swerving at the cat walk?'

'You'll never believe the day I've had...'

Is that pancake ready yet?

Trays on desk read: In/Out/Lose in the Shuffle.

'It's 10:00. Do you know where your kids are?'

"I'm so good at this!"

"Billy's room gets cleaned for free! The cleaning service uses it to train employees how to clean a hazardous waste dump."

IN OUT UP DOWN AND ALL AROUND

"Cat park"

Dog Day Afternoon

"Miss Jones! Clear my schedule until I get this sorted out!"

Help! (Woman stuck on washing line).

In Tray, Out Tray, and Shredded Paper Tray

College student cleans messy dorm room littered with clothes with leafsnow blower

"So I bought this doohickey that is very good with chaos."

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

'When does the improvement phase of this home improvement project begin?'

"My name is Van Gelsing, Madame. I'm an expert in cleaning teenagers' rooms. If you need me, just give me a call, okay?"

The inevitable conflict of interest facing every crisis manager.

Disorder in the Court!

Repletion.

"Please excuse the mess. We had a major paradigm shift."

Paper Trail

'I can't remember the title,but it was on a little white piece of paper.'

"The employees from the two companies are adapting very well to the merger. I wish I could say the same about the computer systems!"

Naughty Puppy Dog.

'When an outboard goes overboard'

"Walter had an attack of road rage in the driveway."

"Ahoy!"

"Yes, tech support? My laptop was really slow, so I shot it – what should I do now?"