Celebrity Buzz Chaser Pillows

"Wow, you're from Beehive 22! Your Queen features a lot in the gossip magazines..."

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

"If Sinatra had eaten here he'd have loved it."

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

'How fast can you hype?'

'Get me public relations!'

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

The Acme Agency: "Dedicated to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Media Exposure."

'My blog has been favourited over half a million times but still no book deal!'

Hollywood or bust!

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

Frank Zappa

'Something that'll get me googled,'

The Daily Fury

'Actually,no. It isn't okay to have a little chat and sign a few autographs!'

As Seen On TV

Skinhead guppy.

"We made mistakes & have evidently lost the trust of the public. Therefore I feel I must tender my resignation..."

"Can you perform under pressure?"

'I want to be a professional Polo player too when I grow up...Can I have your autograph please?'

Signing cage.

'If I never get my 15 minutes of fame, I at least want a giant cutout face of myself.'

Proof you've made it Loud Annoying The voices raised against you

". . . But, hey, man, I just want to say this in all sincerity, man, that you are the greatest, man, you the el numero uno cat in my book, man you. . ."

"Five minutes, General."

"this week on, 'Celebrity Fear Factor,' contestants are threatened with total anonymity."