Sports Star Chaser Pillows

Dirty filthy sweat socks, personally autographed by the Hall of Famer who wore them.

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"My calculations are complete. We could toast 12,000 marshmallows every day for every person on earth for 36,000 years with one solar flare."

"He's deliciously vintage."

"Sheez. I hope they like pictures of dirt."

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Astrological forecasts of the rich and famous

Maps to the homes of guys with friends who know some of the limo drivers of the personal trainers of the stars.

Parents start infant on the way to fame.

'Get me public relations!'

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

Chris Froome

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

'My blog has been favourited over half a million times but still no book deal!'

The Acme Agency: "Dedicated to Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Media Exposure."

Hollywood or bust!

Astronaut

Life in the fastest lane.

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

Frank Zappa

'I'm stressed: My dad was a champion, my mum was a champion, there's a lot of pressure on me to become a champion...'

He won't stop talking about being the fastest ever. He's a broken record about breaking a record.

Destiny is all...

The Daily Fury

As Seen On TV

'Actually,no. It isn't okay to have a little chat and sign a few autographs!'

'Something that'll get me googled,'