Cat Conspiracy Theorist Gifts

"Well, if I didn't send away for an entry application to the cat show, and you didn't send away for an entry application, who did?"

"The mainstream media has entered into a global conspiracy to make us less popular than dogs."

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

"Listen, that's a Tang Dynasty urn we just broke."

"Make it look like nine accidents.'

"The human is back - act normal."

"I did the math, and I'm telling you I have two left!"

"As I near my 9th life, I feel I’m entering a post-curious, pre-fatalist phase of existence."

"Good luck with your interview. And remember, they can't discriminate based on how many lives you have left."

'Just so you know, I've no intention of sharing a home with either children or cats.'

'Watch her, she's a whistle blower!'

'I'm sorry, but your husband's life insurance policy only covered his eighth life.'

"I can't meet you in the park today. The cats suspect something."

"I guess I could include the box... But why would you want it, Mr. Schrödinger?"

'I told you to keep quiet about not liking cats...' (Animal Rights protesters outside the house)

'That's the problem with cats - they can be so destructive.'

The Truth about J.D.'s hatred of Cats.

'Apparently, someone went on my computer and ordered fifty cases of doggy num nums...would you happen to know anything about that?'

Cat Philosophy

"Here's some money and a passport. They'll be looking for you so head to to the border and good luck."

"You've got nine lives? Well then, you're going to need nine life insurance policies!"

"With all the hacking going on, it sure looks like a Russian spy-drone to me."

Evil Pusskins#4

I have no space to 'think outside the box'."

We have your dog

"Tell him I'll pay! On my Mother's nine lives I swear I'll pay!!"