Casual Diner Conundrum T-Shirts

'That's our entry-level menu.'

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

"First I drink, then I barbecue — that's my secret."

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"Any of you guys feel like hot dogs?"

"Fresh pepper?"

"Wait, those crunchy, cheesy little fish thingies are free?!"

How The Sausage Is Eaten

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

'Do you want me to get the fish bone out, or not?'

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"One spaghetti, and two straws please."

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

'Tomato ketchup?' 'Well you wanted the house red.'

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

'The customer is always right...'

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

If you're looking for a good time, you'll find it; if you can't find it, it will find you....

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

Dave's Hamburger Shop

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

Ketchup Kafe...Where Kondiment is King!

"My apologies, but that's not a meatball. That's my computer mouse. I've been looking for it."

"Why don't I start you off with the contact information of everyone who's read those menus over the last 14 days?"

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

"I'm allergic to penicillin—is there penicillin in the salad?"

'We have a strict dress code. Can't let you in without a straightjacket and tie.'

"I've done nothing Instagrammable for months."

"Yes, I'm still working on it."

'I'm afraid things are rather confused around here today, sir- the Soup of the Day is a grilled-cheese sandwich'