Casual Diner With High Expectations T-Shirts

"Of course i can microwave your meal for you, but believe me - it won't make it taste any better."

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

Joe's Kaff for Dinners! And Afters Too!

"Vitamin B6, Vitamin B12, Calcium, Kelp, Brewer's Yeast, Aspirin?"

How The Sausage Is Eaten

'Actually I'm a nerdivore. I only eat your lamer plants and animals: duckbill platypi, cumquats, daffodils, the occasional mudshark.'

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"The Knuckle Sandwich is good."

"For drinks or dinner?"

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

'You'll love this, it has no nutritional value.'

"I like Casual Dining, but this is too casual. I ordered spaghetti!"

Waiter does not want to see customer make bubbles in his wine.

Ketchup Kafe...Where Kondiment is King!

"Hey! Waiter! This is a dessert wine!"

"I'm allergic to penicillin—is there penicillin in the salad?"

'Yes, all our flambe dishes come with injury, liability insurance.'

Man eating his meal with his feet.

"It may not be the lowest cal, but it's low enough cal for me."

"Yes, I'm still working on it."

'Thanks for the invite: Don't cook anything fancy, I eat pretty much anything...'

"Guac-A-Mole"

"You need a hobby."

'May I have two containers - fish for my cat, meat for the dog...vegetables divided as follows, one-fourth for the cat, three-fourths for the dog, but no carrots for the cat - kitty doesn't like carrots...'

' Well..She did it to me again.'

'It's my idea of a seven course meal... a hot dog and a six-pack of beer!'

"When they said it was 'street food' I didn't realise it was all 'roadkill'!"

'I'd like to eat out for a change.'

'Wine and. . . fresh news. . .'

'Hey buddy.Pass that bottle of ketch up here will ya'.'

"Hey, that's your personal pan pizza. NO SHARING!"

"If it's all the same to you, I'd rather eat this not knowing what the latest science suggests."

I recommend the ketchup.

Milly's Home-Style Restaurant

'That's our entry-level menu.'