Carpet Appreciation Gifts

"And remember the rule: when the carpet is old, that's when we hold, when the carpet is new, that's when we spew!"

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

From Here You Can See Bugger All

'Of course I'd never fire you, Nelson. You've been working here for such a long time, you've become part of the furmiture!'

Authentic Rinkelmier chair (Built 1723)

Tilted painting

Genie Gets a Good View on the Beach.

"He's so ostentatious about how un-ostentatious he is."

"Don't go so fast...watch out for those birds...keep your eyes in front!"

New Sheik'n'vac magic carpet freshners.

Men on flying carpets, "I always fly by first class"

The hazards of Cleaning a Magic Carpet

'I am sorry about this vicar, but my wife has just had new carpets fitted.'

'I won't bother you, Mr. Gridley... I just wanted to see how it would feel to walk barefoot on your plush carpeting...'

"We had an expert restore all the original shag carpeting."

'Wall-to-wall carpets go on the floor, not on the walls.'

Bill often considered cutting his armpit hair, but then he'd need to buy carpeting.

'I got the raise!'

'Hello, high gloss floor wax - I'd like customer service. Yeah - I would like to report a problem!'

'If you get chilly, use that crazy quilt.'

'Hey, awesome jacket, Melanie! Suede?'

'Sir, I feel I'd achieve more if I had a chair.'

Bird on Flying Carpet.

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Air Mail

Office carpets,putting green type.

Biggo Carpet Co.: 'Out cutting a rug'

'Carpets' 'Try before you buy'

'That's the last Indian carpet we ever buy'.

"Sorry, Johnson, you've been down sized."

'Admit it Abdullah, this magic carpet of yours has us hopelessly lost in the desert.'

Magic carpet mechanic underneath carpet saying 'try it now',

'Okay, try it now.'