Care Home Life Gifts

Old dear crossing.

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

'Hi hon! How's the little monster?'

"It's an update from the people tracking us. According to this, we haven't gone anywhere or done anything."

'I know he doesn't like this house, but he'll just have to get used to it.'

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

'Do you realize that we're sitting in a prefabricated house, eating precooked dinners, and listening to Chris Matthews' opinions?'

Self-Isolating. Do Not Disturb (Except For Food).

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

'Your fur looks like you slept in it.'

'I'm glad you're able to be with us more, but I'd appreciate it if you'd say you're 'spending time' with us, not 'doing time' with us.'

"Attention, everyone! Here comes Poppa, and we're going to drive dull care away! It's quips and cranks and wanton wiles, nods and becks and wreathed smiles."

"I'm trying to create a hologram of myself. If I'm successful, I'll never have to attend school, go to the dentist or go anywhere else that's boring again."

'Fancy us all being afraid of wasps when there's a WHOLE nest of 'em in my drinks cabinet!'

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

Comb Sweet Comb

'You know I'd take the blame kid, but I'm still on shakey ground over that carpet incident.'

'Settle an argument. Which is better incessant barking or meowing?'

'Dear, you know how I hate it when you bring your work home.'

'Hon, can you fill the dog's water dish?'

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

Cats on the couch.

On Valentine's Day, sometimes you don't need cards, candy or flowers from the ones who love you.

"Hello? Guys? Okay, I've had a long day and I'm very tired, so no pranks this time. I'm serious... guys?!"

"Sorry, my report is blank. I just stayed home, watched tv and played video games during vacation."

"Have you been using 'Vanish' again?"

"Twenty five years... I think it's time we renew our towels."

'What about you...you've been living here thirty years too?'

'Now that's Real TV!'