Care Home Worker Gifts

"Poor old dear can't talk much anymore I wonder what he's thinking...?" "Nice tits."

Opportunities in Coronatimes

2021

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

Children's Parties

Cry babies.

vaccine wars.

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

"Our war is against cancer."

Interior design trends for parents....

DO Not Disturb (Except For Meals)

Covid Inquiry / Enquiry

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

'You call it a bra. I call it excess packaging.'

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

"The prostate biopsy shows your pain threshold is much higher than normal."

'Well, well, well...'

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown and Jill said 'I told you so'."

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

Social distancing

"This is nice, but I can't help but think we forgot something."

"What's that mark on your arm, Mama?"

"I'm feeling completely wiped out."

A Communal Breakfast for the Young