Car Crash Comedian Gifts

'Instead of getting our car fixed, I used the check from the insurance company on something more important...a big-screen TV.'

What say we don't put a claim in on this one. He barely grazed me.

'I swear this self driving car is falsifying it's records to avoid an insurance rate hike."

'Do you remember what make of car it was, sir? -- We'll have to order parts.'

Man crashes his car before leaving the driveway because he forgot his glasses.

'As I am writing this, a dozen people are watching me. They think I'm leaving details of my insurance company, but I am not!'

'?6.50 for the lesson and ?56 extra for this. . .'

Air Bag Recall Center

"Don't worry. The mechanic says he can fix the car as soon as he gets it out of the wall."

'Are we nearly there yet?'

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

'Doctor, your road rage patient is here.'

'Beware of SUV.'

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

"Okay. Hit it."

'That is one nasty whiplash!'

A Not So Grand Slam.

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

For every dog who gets the window seat, there's Steve, the designated driver.

'How was my emergency stop?'

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

"Drat! A flat tyre. . ."

Cotton candy

Australian Sat Nav - 'Straight on mate'.

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

Man who has crashed his safety bicycle

'It doesn't work...'

"And hold the mayo."

'Why can't you ride under the dash like other airbags?'

Driver with a rear view mirror attached to his forehead.

'Number of days since last accident' a man is falling off of ladder while trying to post numbers...