Car Crash Comedians Gifts

Direct Line telephone being hit by a car.

'Don't get involved.'

'Oh, no -- not again!'

'Guess who I swopped insurance details with.'

'That is one nasty whiplash!'

'Are we nearly there yet?'

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'Doctor, your road rage patient is here.'

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

Watch overhead if you want to improve product delivery. Bridge financing could figure.

For every dog who gets the window seat, there's Steve, the designated driver.

A Not So Grand Slam.

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

"Okay. Hit it."

'How was my emergency stop?'

"Your new car won't start? Oh, well, umm…that's just the car's Collision Avoidance System kicking in. It doesn't want you to hit anything today."

"Drat! A flat tyre. . ."

Cotton candy

Freak Accident Specialist

Pine tree driving a truck with a human-shaped air freshener hanging off the mirror

"And hold the mayo."

'It doesn't work...'

My car idles well! It learned a lot from you!

'Do you remember what make of car it was, sir? -- We'll have to order parts.'

Live To Crash, Crash To Live.

'I swear this self driving car is falsifying it's records to avoid an insurance rate hike."

'Number of days since last accident' a man is falling off of ladder while trying to post numbers...

"Well done!"

Parking? I don't think so.

'Business has doubled since we organized that women's beach volleyball tournament across the street.'

The life of a crash-test dummy

While they were having a celebration in the back, this limo driver recklessly ran into a pole. I"ll cite him for being a party crasher.

Concerto for...head-on crash and orchestra.

Man crashes his car before leaving the driveway because he forgot his glasses.

"Of all the vehicles in heaven and you had to rear-end his car?"