Canoeing Satirist Gifts

Sorry, pal, no - there's no rest stop for the wicked.

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

Chicken soup for the sole.

"Actually, I used them as collateral for a loan."

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

Guide fish.

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

Walking the Plank.

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

Man painting MOM on boat

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

Shark Chum

'We're drifting apart.'

'I'm not scaring the fish - I'm WARNING the fish!'

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

Another hot flash?

Fish Farm.

"Hey wader, there's a fly in my sloop"

'That's his new trophy fishwife.'

Fish near-death experiences.

"Nope, not a dock! Not a diving board! Guess again!"

"I have to go on a diet! According to that fisherman I have gained fifty pounds overnight!!"

'I think I caught one of those fish showing on the graph.'

"I didn’t need to tie his hands—I just entered it into his GPS. In three feet, the destination is below you."

"Of course I'm self-absorbed. I'm a sponge!"

'Aye, but can you guys get 500 channels with those hooks?'

Contended beaver nurses a full stomach having eaten the captains wooden leg.